


Take My Whole Life, Too

by nightbirdrises



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, Reaction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-12
Updated: 2014-10-12
Packaged: 2018-02-20 23:06:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2446448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightbirdrises/pseuds/nightbirdrises
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A reaction to s6 spoilers UP THROUGH 6.04, with tidbits of 6.05 thrown in. Would take place approximately around 6.06/6.07. On <a href="http://princehummel.tumblr.com/post/99643784906">tumblr</a> too.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Take My Whole Life, Too

**Author's Note:**

> A reaction to s6 spoilers UP THROUGH 6.04, with tidbits of 6.05 thrown in. Would take place approximately around 6.06/6.07. On [tumblr](http://princehummel.tumblr.com/post/99643784906) too.

He hears Rachel long before he sees her.

"Kurt!"

Kurt sighs, continues to organize the sheet music they’ll be handing out in rehearsal today. He knows what’s coming; he’s not looking forward to it, but it was inevitable, really, that she’d find out. Rachel marches into the choir room and Kurt doesn’t bother acknowledging her seeing as she’s going to speak either way.

"Kurt, I just heard a very interesting tidbit about your personal life."

"We really are back in high school again, aren’t we?" he mutters, swearing under his breath when a sheet of paper slices through the skin of his thumb.

"Don’t give me that, a fifty year-old guy? That you met  _online_?”

"Rachel—"

"No, you listen to me." He turns around, ignoring the spikes of pain in his thumb as he presses it against his pointer finger to stave off the bleeding. "Ever since you came back to Lima you’ve been in this downward spiral and it’s obviously not getting any better. How are we supposed to inspire the people in here like that?"

"This has nothing to do with the New Directions," Kurt says, defensive (he knows his personal issues have been affecting his work, but he’ll be damned if he lets Rachel have the satisfaction of his admitting to that), "and I’m not dating that guy you heard about. Maybe that was the intent, but we’ve decided to be friends. For now. At least he’s mature and knows what he’s doing."

"But you aren’t and you don’t," Rachel throws back. Kurt crosses his arms; she’s been more irritable than usual after the Invitational, not because they did poorly (though they sort of did) but because it means the next step is Sectionals. Still, he’s not about to let her rail against him.

"What’s your point?"

"My point is that you are falling apart, Kurt, and I can’t have an assistant that—"

"For the last time, I am in no way your  _assistant_ ,” Kurt says through his teeth. “Either we’re co-directors or you’re doing this by yourself.” Rachel glares at him for a moment before shaking her head.

"You know I care very deeply about you," she starts; Kurt scoffs, "but you’re not the only one having problems. Do you see me moping around about my dads’ divorce?"

"Look," Kurt says, pinching the bridge of his nose, "I’m doing the best I can, and maybe the best I can do isn’t enough but you know what? I’m trying to move on, get back on my feet. Why do you think I’m doing this online dating thing in the first place?"

"You’re not going to solve anything by picking up a replacement for Blaine off of the Internet," Rachel says quietly. "I’m glad you got a friend out of it, even if he is twice your age, but moving on doesn’t only mean dating new guys. Trust me, I know."

Kurt watches her for a long while, then picks his bag up from the piano bench. “I think I’m going to take today off.”

"Okay. See you tomorrow, Kurt." He nods and leaves the room, ignoring the students milling about as he heads for the parking lot and his Navigator.

Having his car back is a perk of being home, at least.

 

* * *

 

He really should have stayed to help direct rehearsal. It’s doing nothing for him to be home alone with his thoughts, especially in his room, which is full of all the kinds of memories he’d rather not be thinking about right now. At McKinley he has to deal with Rachel, the new-new-New Directions, and the latest Sue Sylvester shenanigans - he would have a newfound appreciation for his old show choir director if not for the Invitational - but all of that mostly has nothing to do with Blaine, which automatically makes it easier to deal with.

What’s he doing, anyway? He’d told Rachel - through tears - that he’d returned to Lima to get Blaine back. He’d told himself as he signed up for the online dating service that it would just be a way to pass the time while he waits for Blaine to realize that the two of them are _it_ , no questions asked. Is that really what it is, though? Maybe he has finally given up, and he should move back to New York and forget everything.

Kurt huffs, staring up at his ceiling as he lies on the bed. Forgetting isn’t an option. Moving back isn’t one, either; he really  _does_  want to help the New Directions, as frustrating as it is sometimes. 

He could call his new friend, he might have his own insights. But then again, he has already heard some advice from him, albeit indirectly:

_"I’ve spent too long being around someone I didn’t love the way I should have. I’ve wasted too many years. I’m trying to find that spark I’ve been missing out on, and when I get it, I’m never letting go."_

Could he find someone he can love as much as he loves Blaine? It seems impossible, especially now, after various failed attempts at finding the same spark in other people. He could end up marrying someone he likes but doesn’t love, only to get a divorce so many years down the line that it’s almost too late to search out the kind of connection he lost back when he was barely into his twenties. But then again, if a miracle occurs and he  _does_  marry Blaine, will they just self-destruct again in a few years? Would it be worth it if that happened?

Kurt’s phone rings before he can consider it; he tugs it out of his pocket and blinks dumbly at the name on the screen. 

_David Karofsky_

His first instinct is to let it go to voicemail. His second instinct tells him no, the last time he ignored Dave nearly turned into a tragedy and although it wasn’t entirely his fault, he played a part in it. So he answers.

"Hello?"

"Kurt, is that you?"

"…Kar- um, Dave?" He sits up. "I didn’t know you still had my number."

"Yeah, well. Can we talk?"

"With all due respect, I really don’t think—"

"We broke up."

Kurt freezes, halfway between sitting and standing. “You what?”

"That’s why I want to talk. Can you meet me at the Lima Bean, like right now? I’ll buy you a coffee or whatever."

"Please tell me you’re not asking me out." Kurt hears a puff of laughter from Dave’s side.

"No, no way."

"Good. I’ll be there."

"Cool. See you."

Kurt rushes through changing into something suitable in record time; he thinks he probably looks like a disaster, but his priority is to find out what Dave has to say. He can’t imagine what it could be that he absolutely must know - was he in love and is now heartbroken? It didn’t sound like it. Was  _Blaine_  in love and Dave found that he couldn’t reciprocate?

That thought leaves a bitter taste in Kurt’s mouth, so he chases it away with the radio as he drives. Snow falls gently outside; it’s a little bit early for that, he thinks, but he doesn’t mind. It’s just a reminder that his favorite time of the year is so close he can taste it, and that idea lifts his heart enough that he’s smiling when he walks into the Lima Bean a few minutes later.

He spots Dave and, though he knows none of this is really Dave’s fault, his smile slips away. “Hey.”

Dave starts, turning around. “Oh, you made it. I thought, with the snow…”

"I’m interested in knowing what’s so urgent that you want to talk to me about it immediately after your breakup," Kurt says with a shrug. He sits down opposite Dave and only then notices the cup of coffee sitting there. "What’s this?"

"Uh, nonfat mocha with whipped cream."

Kurt arches an eyebrow. “You know my coffee order.”

"That’s… sort of why I want to talk to you. I only know that ‘cause of, uh, him." Kurt rolls his eyes, wrapping his fingers around the cup for warmth and comfort.

"You can say his name, I’m not going to fall to pieces. For one thing, we’re friends, and for another, this isn’t the first time we’ve hit a roadblock."

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Anyway, I told you we broke up, right?"

"I’m sorry," Kurt says, mostly out of courtesy. Dave shakes his head.

"Don’t be, it’s fine. I think I saw it coming a long time ago, and as great as he is, I don’t think we’re really each other’s type. He’s been in a weird mood for a couple of weeks now, ever since he talked to you about something, he never actually told me what it was—"

"I told him I started using an online dating service and I was about to go on my first date with someone," Kurt says quietly. It’s the last meaningful conversation he’s had with Blaine, so it can’t be anything else. Well, aside from the memorable hours spent stuck and mildly terrified in an elevator with him. He decides not to mention that to Dave, given what then occurred. "I didn’t think he cared, aside from being happy for me."

"Maybe he did," Dave says, shrugging. "I don’t know anything for sure, I’m just guessing. But yeah, last night we were talking and… suddenly we were broken up. It was like a business deal or something. He’s moving his stuff back to his house right now."

Kurt realizes he’s gripping the cup too tightly and forces himself to relax. “Why are you telling me all of this? I’m moving on. It’s the right thing to do.”

"You’re kidding me, right?" Dave looks amused, which only irritates him.

"No. Fairy tales don’t exist, I’ve had that knocked into my head by now. In high school, I thought he was a prince. Given all that’s happened since, I need to stop thinking of him like that."

"He’s just a guy."

"Exactly."

"Except you love him."

"Fairy tales don’t exist," Kurt repeats firmly. He wonders if he’s trying to convince himself more than Dave. "We have problems and they won’t just disappear in the face of love. I just, I can’t do another break-up like the ones we’ve had."

"Then don’t break up again. Third time’s the charm, right?"

"Why are you being so insistent?" Dave shifts and Kurt leans towards him without thinking.

“‘Cause I care about him. And you, which I know is weird after… what I did, but—” He pauses. “You know, Blaine never wanted us to talk about you. Thing is, though, he always talked about you anyway. Little things, like your coffee order. And out of all the guys he could have dated to try to forget you, he picked me.” Dave gives Kurt a half-smile. “Dating your ex’s bully doesn’t seem like the right way to forget him.”

"Former bully," Kurt reminds him, smiling a little. "I see what you’re getting at, but isn’t it too soon? You’ve just broken up, and I’m sure you must have had some feelings for him or you wouldn’t have gone as far as you did. Same with him," he adds, unable to keep from sounding somewhat strained at the thought of Blaine having feelings for someone else. Dave glances down at the table.

"I think most of the feelings were pretty one-sided," he says. "He’s just a good guy, and, I don’t know, I guess he was trying to feel the same way but couldn’t get there. As far as I did, anyway."

"How far…" Kurt trails off, suddenly knowing without having to ask. "I’m sorry," he says, sincerely this time. Dave shrugs and looks back up at him.

"It’s no big deal, it happens. It just means that I think you guys should give it another shot, you both deserve that."

"I don’t know, Dave."

"Think about it. Sing him a song or something, whatever you guys usually do." Kurt laughs, shaking his head.

"Contrary to popular opinion, we do more than just sing at each other and read fashion magazines. But I promise, I’ll think about it." Dave nods and stands up. Kurt expects him to leave right away, but he’s surprised when he grins, leaning against the chair.

"You were kind of my inspiration, you know that? All the confidence you have, and knowing exactly who you are."

"I don’t—"

"I haven’t seen that guy in a while. If you’re gonna get Blaine back, you gotta bring that Kurt back. Just an idea." He waves farewell and turns, leaving Kurt sitting stunned with a half-empty cup of coffee in front of him.

No. Half-full.

 

* * *

 

The elevator thing had been an interesting debacle. Kurt finds himself thinking about it while lying in bed the night after meeting Dave at the Lima Bean. Nothing scandalous had actually  _happened_ , per se, but there had been… something. Kurt doesn’t know what to think of it.

Mostly, he’d been scared out of his wits by who he now knows was Sue dressed as some horror film figure on a bike. Blaine was scared, too, though not to the same degree, so he’d comforted Kurt, sat close with his arm around him as they waited for the elevator to be unlocked. Nothing had happened beyond that, and yet, now that Kurt thinks back, something had happened.

It wasn’t their conversation; that was nothing special, they always tend to toe the line between friends and lovers as they talk, it’s just how they work. Blaine had seemed to be in a strange mood, though Kurt didn’t notice at the time, being more worried about their situation and the indignity of Sue Sylvester’s various plots involving the two of them, as if she has some say in whether they’re meant for each other or not.

There had been a moment. 

(They always seem to have moments.)

Blaine had teetered on the edge of saying something, eyes fixed on Kurt’s with all the seriousness and creeping nervousness of a man about to ask a question, the answer to which he isn’t sure he wants to hear. Then he’d leaned ever so slightly towards Kurt, as if to kiss him. Kurt nearly forgot himself and surged ahead to close the space, but he held back. No need to make Blaine a cheater, not again.

All of it took place in the space of about five seconds; afterwards, they went on as if nothing happened. 

Kurt turns over on the bed, finds himself staring at his lamp, the nightstand, and finally the drawer of the nightstand. Inside is the ring that he never returned to Blaine, never had the chance to. (And if he did somehow have the chance, would he have even wanted to?) He can’t see it but it’s clear as day in his mind, a silver band that spent enough time on his finger that he’d felt an emptiness when he took it off.

Thinking about it, seeing it in his mind’s eye, he suddenly knows: he wants to wear that ring again. More than that, he wants to finally see a ring on Blaine’s finger too, to know that they’re in this together for good.

That’s too big a step to take, of course. Or is it?

Kurt turns back over, away from the ring. No one in their right mind would propose to their ex before getting back together - even when Blaine had proposed, they had at least been together. Not for long, but still.

The idea sticks to him, however. It’s a bold, daring move that he’d never make in a million years for anyone, except perhaps Blaine. It’s something that could end in disaster, in a rejection that has the potential to make Kurt give up. And not just the kind of giving up where he moves back to New York City and tries dating again; the kind of giving up where he moves somewhere else, maybe Chicago, and attempts to forget everything he has ever associated with Blaine Anderson.

In spite of all of the above, he finds himself imagining how he would propose. Would it be a public affair? Not the question itself, he isn’t willing to leave himself exposed to more than the only person that matters when he asks. He could perform. Not something flashy - he’s _good_  at that, but when it comes to this, he needs to be as stripped down and true as he can manage. Closer to “Being Alive” than “Not the Boy Next Door,” that is.

Blaine likes… a lot of music, but older classics especially. Kurt smiles at a memory; they’d talked about the song for their first dance. It was going to be “Can’t Help Falling in Love.” 

It’s not just a lightbulb that goes on - it’s a whole damn firework display.

Kurt throws off the covers before he can convince himself otherwise and grabs his laptop. While waiting for it to turn on he hears someone moving about the house; probably Carole, going to make herself some tea after having a nightmare. That happens sometimes - Kurt has, not nightmares exactly, but dreams that leave him feeling like he’s missing an important part of himself when he wakes.

The laptop finally boots up and Kurt’s door opens ever so slightly, making his heartbeat spike with fear before he recognizes the shape of his dad in the doorway.

"Bit late to be doing homework, isn’t it?"

Kurt smiles, reaches to turn the lamp on. “It’s not homework.”

"Sounds like something that could wait until morning, then." Burt sits heavily on the edge of the bed and gives Kurt an indecipherable look.

"What? I’m doing prep work for a performance."

"You haven’t performed in months, bud. Not that I’ve heard of, anyway."

"Does that mean I can’t ever perform again? What are you doing up, anyway?"

"I dunno, I woke up and thought I’d check on you. Call it father’s intuition or something, but I get the feeling you have something you wanna talk about."

"I…" Kurt looks up at Burt, who does nothing to encourage him but Kurt knows that he won’t judge him unfairly for anything. "I— I’m thinking about singing for Blaine."

"And?"

"And… I think I want to propose."

Burt raises his eyebrows. “That’s kinda out of left field, even for you.”

"You think it’s a bad idea."

"I think it’s a crazy idea," Burt says. Kurt opens his mouth to retaliate, but is cut off when his dad continues, "Crazy don’t always mean bad."

"I guess I just feel like it’s the right thing to do. I’m not saying I want to trap him in an all-or-nothing situation," Kurt says, careful with his words. "I need to do something big. Something that will make him see that I love him as much as he has ever loved me, something… something Blaine-like, but with a Kurt Hummel twist."

"Well, you know I’m not gonna tell you what to do."

"I always appreciate your honest opinions, Dad. Tell me."

"I think it’s a big risk to take." Kurt’s face falls. "Don’t look at me like that, it’s true. Not just proposing, the whole getting engaged thing. I’m guessing you two haven’t talked much about your issues."

"…No, but there’ll be time for that. We’re both going to be here for a while, in separate homes and schools."

Burt nods. “Fair enough. Still, I don’t want to see you hurt again. You love this guy like nothing else, the entire goddamn  _world_  can see it, and Blaine loves you too, I believe that completely. But he might not be ready to jump back into the ring yet, you know?”

"Yeah," Kurt says, quiet and thoughtful.

"I’ve said it before, you’re an adult and you can make your own decisions. Just wait ‘til morning before you keep thinking about it, though, get some sleep. Things might look different then."

"Okay, I can do that. Thanks, Dad."

"No problem, Kurt." Burt stands up with a grunt. "Sleep tight."

"I love you."

"Love you too. Put that thing away." Kurt rolls his eyes and shuts his laptop down, sticking his tongue out at his dad, who shakes his head and leaves the room.

Once Kurt settles back into bed, he’s tired enough that he doesn’t dwell much on Blaine. He only thinks one thing before drifting off:

_I’m going to marry him. Someday._

 

* * *

 

His doubts come rushing back with the light of day, so Kurt drops the notion of proposing for the next few days or so (though he does send a memo to the band to look into the song, just in case; they don’t ask questions). He has more pressing matters to attend to, anyway, like Rachel.

"You can’t seriously be considering that mash-up for Sectionals."

"It’s brilliant!"

"The judges won’t take it seriously!"

"That may be what you think, but I believe I have a tad more experience in this area—"

"I joined this club at the same time you did. We have the same amount of experience." Rachel huffs and crosses the song out on their list.

"Fine. We’ll pick something else."

“ _Thank_  you.”

"Kurt!" Both Kurt and Rachel turn in surprise as Sam runs into the choir room, nearly out of breath. "Go to the courtyard."

"Why?"

"Just go, man, it’s important." Kurt raises an eyebrow; he knows what constitutes to Sam as something important, and the only thing that would also concern Kurt at this moment is…

"Blaine’s out there, isn’t he?"

"Uh… no?" Sam says uncertainly. Kurt glances at Rachel, who seems torn between telling Kurt to go and telling him to forget it, they have better things to do than meet with exes. Kurt himself feels torn in much the same way, though he’s leaning more towards going; he never wants to ignore Blaine, not after the disastrous results of the last time he consciously ignored him.

"You’re a terrible liar, Sam." Kurt shrugs his bag onto his shoulder. "He’s not planning on singing, is he?"

"I don’t, uh, maybe?"

"Well, that’s not happening if I have anything to say about it. I’ll go see what he wants." He leaves Sam with Rachel, not looking back; they probably have things to talk through, anyway. 

The walk to the courtyard marks the first time he thinks of his proposal scheme since he uncovered the ring he’d bought Blaine just before their break-up; he went looking for it the morning after he spoke with his dad, and merely a glance at it had forced him to shove it into the drawer with his own ring, deciding to think on it some more. 

It’s silver, like his, and fairly simple. He’d regretted the purchase for weeks, months even, and planned to return it. He never did, and when he packed for Ohio with the idea of getting Blaine back, he took it along. Not because he planned on proposing upon his arrival, but because he likes to be prepared.

He doesn’t need it yet; he’ll see what Blaine has to say. Even though Blaine could very well be telling him that he doesn’t want to date for a while (or ever again), Kurt can’t keep his heart from pounding faster, louder, as he nears the courtyard. It’s snowing gently outside, but it’s still warm enough that groups of people are scattered among the tables. Kurt spots Blaine alone at a table close to the steps and takes a steadying breath before walking towards him.

Blaine sees him before he gets near enough to speak and jumps up, motioning to - of course - a group of Warblers off to the side. Kurt sends them a glare and draws up to Blaine in the next few steps.

"I think you’ve sung enough songs to me here for a lifetime," Kurt says. "Can we just talk?"

"Sure," Blaine says, a little deflated as he sits down opposite Kurt. "I guess you’ve probably heard…"

"I know that you and Dave broke up."

"We did," Blaine says, nodding. "Do you know why?"

"Not exactly," Kurt says slowly. "I have theories, but no more than that. We talked, you know."

"I— You did?" 

"Mhm. We talked about how strange you’ve apparently been acting lately."

"Oh." Blaine looks down at his hands, smiles a little. "I guess, yeah, I’ve been… thinking a lot, lately."

"A dangerous pastime."

"Hey, it’s not like I  _planned_  on thinking about you like that again, I mean—” Blaine pauses, visibly nervous like he expects Kurt to stand up and leave. “I’m just not good at imagining you living a life without me. When all we talked about was glee, or my own relationship, it was okay. Talking about you, and how you started dating again after all this time, it was like… that’s it. No going back.”

"What exactly are you getting at?" Kurt asks. He rests his hand on his leg, near his phone where it sits in his pocket. "I’m confused."

"I still love you, Kurt," Blaine says, eyes wide and… scared? "I started thinking about how if you ended up clicking with this guy, I’d probably never have a chance to be with you again. Before, it was still a possibility, and I didn’t realize how much I was relying on you just… waiting for me."

"I didn’t click with him romantically, he turned out to be fifty with kids," Kurt mutters. "Nice guy, handsome, but…" He sighs. "I can’t wait for you forever, I can’t hinge my life on you like that. Not on someone who started living with someone else."

"No, I know, I just wasn’t thinking about it until it was staring me in the face." Blaine reaches for the hand that Kurt has on the table; there’s a split-second, Kurt considers the idea of pulling away, but then Blaine’s hand is on his and it feels like coming home. "Forgive me?"

"For what?"

Blaine shrugs. “Everything. Making you wait. Rachel told me why you really came back to Ohio.”

"Of course she did."

"I don’t want to make you wait anymore, Kurt, not unless you want to. I’ll respect your decision if you do."

"I need you to do something first," Kurt says after a beat. Blaine nods, his eyes telling him that he’ll do anything; it’s a look Kurt has seen before, and he hopes that Blaine will think about his response or else they won’t get anywhere. "I need you to forgive me too."

"What? But you never—"

"Please, Blaine, you know as well as I do that this wasn’t just some one-sided issue. We’ve both made mistakes, a lot of them. Some of them are mistakes we keep making over and over again. If we’re going to do this again, we need a clean slate." Kurt squeezes Blaine’s hand. "We shouldn’t  _forget_ , but we can’t let the same problems haunt us forever or we’ll never make it.”

"Yeah, of course. I forgive you."

"Are you sure? Because if even a tiny part of you resents me, for example, for wanting us to take a break in the first place, which I would totally understand, that could come back to punch us both in the face and—"

"Kurt," Blaine says, cutting him off with a fond smile. "I forgive you, one hundred percent."

"Okay," Kurt says, embarrassed at how he’d started rambling. He clears his throat and pulls his phone from his pocket, certain now of his decision. Well, part of it at least. He texts a few people under the table - the band, Rachel, Sam. "So, wait, you were going to sing about this to me?"

"Maybe."

Kurt shakes his head, says, “You do realize it’s not exactly like high school anymore, right? You’re on  _my_  turf now.” He spots the band trooping into the courtyard and stands; their hands break apart, but he holds his back out to Blaine as he motions with the other to the band, hoping that they’ll understand what he’s asking for. Blaine takes it just after the music starts and stands with him.

"Where are we going?"

"The auditorium." Blaine starts off in one direction, stops when Kurt tugs his hand towards a different route. "Come on," he says, winking, "I know a shortcut."

He leads Blaine through a door and the band, faithful as ever, follows at a reasonable distance, continuing the instrumental intro as if they’ve read Kurt’s mind, they know he isn’t starting until they reach their destination.

(Sometimes he thinks they really  _can_  read his mind, but that’s a thought for another day.)

Kurt has a moment of worry, thinking that maybe his other messages haven’t been read in time - but his worries are dashed when he leads Blaine onto the stage and sees Rachel, Sam… and the entirety of the (new new) New Directions, even Santana and Brittany. They’re all seated in a mostly-together group, front and center.

If Kurt cared to examine them, he’d notice that most of the New Directions, being new to the world of this group, aren’t exactly invested in what’s going on. It’s likely that Rachel shepherded them in here herself, determined to allow them to have witnesses since it’s too last-minute to drag everyone that  _really_  knows Kurt and Blaine (and KurtandBlaine) back to Lima.

But Kurt doesn’t care. They might as well be alone on this stage for all that matters, as he turns and places one hand on Blaine’s waist, sings, “ _Wise men say only fools rush in, but I can’t help falling in love with you…_ ”

Blaine grins, seems unable to look away as Kurt leads him in a dance - it’s their planned first dance, and though they’ll have to pick a new song if they make it to the actual getting married part this time, Kurt thinks it’s fitting. This dance marks a new beginning, a hopeful beginning. It’s not a first dance as husbands; it’s the first dance of the third and final installment of their story. Kurt believes, hopes, that this one will have a happy ending.

“ _Darling, so it goes, some things are meant to be…_ ”

“ _Take my hand, take my whole life too…_ ”

“ _For I can’t help falling in love with you…_ ”

Kurt doesn’t realize that they’ve come to a full stop, swaying together just to the right of center stage. He doesn’t realize it until Blaine leans in, and this time he does meet him for a kiss, soft and sure.

"We’re really doing this again?" Blaine asks quietly as Rachel and Sam leap up, cheering. Brittany’s cheering as well, and Santana - even after the things she said the last time she was in direct contact with Kurt - has a small, sincere smile on her face.

"Yes. Is that okay? You don’t think we’re being foolish?"

Blaine touches his forehead to Kurt’s, sings, “ _Wise men say only fools rush in_ —” Kurt cuts him off with another kiss before pulling back, grinning.

"You’re still on my turf, Blaine Warbler."

"This doesn’t mean I’m gonna go easy on you now, Hummel," Blaine warns. "No transfers this time."

"That’s fair. Still, I know what it does to you when I win."

"You  _like_  what it does to me.”

"Guilty as charged," Kurt says, pecking him on the cheek and finally turning to their audience. "Thanks for coming, you guys."

"Oh, you know I wouldn’t miss the next chapter of your fucked-up fairy tale for anything. I can’t wait for the part where the dragon finally mauls the two of you—"

"Thank you, Santana."

"Kurt," Rachel says; he shifts his gaze to her and sees a look that clearly means  _we should talk_.

"Later," he mouths back; he has one more thing to do. It’s surprising that she appears to be supportive after all she’s said, but not surprising enough that Kurt wants to skip the step he suddenly wants to take, like, right now.

"You’re thinking," Blaine says while Sam and Rachel herd the New Directions back to the choir room. "What’s up?"

"Do you have time to spare?" 

Blaine raises an eyebrow. “For you, yes.”

"Then let’s go to my house."

 

* * *

 

Blaine obviously thinks they’re about to consummate the revival of their relationship, and Kurt feels only slightly bad for keeping the truth from him for the time being. After all, if things go well, that may happen anyway. Mostly he’s battling with himself. What happens if he asks and Blaine says no? Would he come to the realization, finally, that Kurt may be going too far and call everything off? That’s the worst case scenario, but still…

It’s not enough to make Kurt not want to do it. It’s so against what he usually believes in, and after what he said to Santana and Brittany he knows it’s ridiculously hypocritical of him to do this now, but it feels right. This is Blaine. Maybe it’s just Blaine’s tendency towards overly grand gestures rubbing off on him, but Kurt still believes that this is the best way to show how serious he is about them.

Sure, Blaine knows that Kurt loves him.

Kurt needs Blaine to  _know_  that Kurt loves him just as he knows the sky is blue and the sun rises each day. No more questioning, no more wondering. Just knowing.

If it takes proposing to him to reach that point, then damn it, Kurt will break their record and propose an hour after they’ve gotten back together to do exactly that. He’d take down the stars for Blaine, hand him the universe; a ring is a little more plausible, though.

Blaine reaches for Kurt’s waist as soon as they’re in his room, but Kurt shakes his head, motioning for Blaine to sit on the bed. He does, confused and possibly a little put out.

"Okay." Kurt takes a deep breath, lets it out. "Please feel free to stop me if you think I’m absolutely insane."

"I’d never think that."

"Yeah, well, we’ll see." Kurt sits next to Blaine, leaving enough space between them for their hands to rest there, fingers intertwined. "You are much better than I am at making speeches and speaking from your heart in general, but I owe it to you to try, I think.

"Once upon a time, a very lonely boy met someone he couldn’t believe was real, because he was someone that might as well have been plucked right out of his dreams. His mother used to tell him fairy tales with handsome princes and beautiful princesses; this boy he met seemed like a prince from those stories in the way he saved him.

"Time went on. The prince stumbled a few times and so did the boy, but their story together was a… well, a magical one, really. The boy came to see himself as a prince, as well, slowly but surely.

"The fairy tale shattered, of course. The prince wasn’t a prince, the boy wasn’t a prince or a boy but a man with more to lose than he thought possible. Fairy tales don’t exist - that became his mantra, even as things got better.

"Blaine," Kurt says, pulling himself from the story - he realizes he sounds like his mom, not that Blaine would notice such a thing. "I was so sure that my childhood dream of having a fairy tale relationship was impossible. We’re both human, right? We made some mistakes… some worse than others. I still loved you, but I didn’t see a fairy tale in what we had, I saw… I don’t know. Reality, I thought.

"But all fairy tales have dragons, evil witches, you name it. The stuff that you think is going to destroy the happily ever after, and sometimes it almost does. You and me, we’re not princes, we’re knights. We’ve fought these things and sometimes we’ve lost, but we’ve never lost  _everything_. At least, I don’t think so.

"We come back, we win, and we face the next monster that comes our way. What I want to know…" Kurt clears his throat, stands up and opens his drawer to grab the box before settling down to one knee in front of Blaine, whose breath hitches. "…is if you’ll keep on fighting dragons and chasing happily ever after with me, as best friends and lovers and more. Blaine Anderson, will you marry me?"

"Oh, Kurt… you didn’t just buy that, did you?"

Kurt shakes his head, glancing at the ring. “I’ve had it for a long time now.”

"Sounds familiar." Blaine stares at it for so long that Kurt thinks he’s going to refuse, internally prepares himself for it even as he knows that there’s no preparing for his imagined worst scenario. He’s done his part - if nothing else, Blaine knows. It’s just a matter of whether Blaine’s willing to accept it so soon. "Come here."

"But—" Kurt stands, feeling limp. "You haven’t—" Blaine stands with him and kisses him, off-center and hard.

"If you think you’re insane for asking," he says when they break, "then am I insane for saying yes?" 

"Some people would think so," Kurt says, but his heart is lifting, it feels like it might beat right out of his chest. "You, you really mean it? Yes?"

“ _Yes_ ,” Blaine repeats firmly. Kurt’s fingers are shaky as he puts the ring on Blaine’s, but he manages without dropping it.

"I still have mine," Kurt says, tilting his head at the nightstand. "Can I…"

"Please, allow me."

It doesn’t take long after Kurt’s ring is back in its rightful place - and  _god_  does it feel good, fills that emptiness - for them to fall onto the bed, kissing at a languid, easy pace that allows them to relearn each other. They don’t consummate anything; there’s an unspoken agreement to wait until they have guaranteed privacy and time since Burt will be home soon, and Carole, too. But they kiss, touch, whisper to each other, smile in the crooks of necks and bite playfully at earlobes. 

"I like your speech better," Blaine says. Kurt scoffs. "No, really. I love the idea of being knights."

"You’re about to ask me to call you Sir Blaine."

"I wasn’t, actually, I was going to say something about friendly sword fights… but I like the sound of that."

Kurt rests his cheek on Blaine’s chest. “You’re ridiculous.”

"On the contrary, Sir Kurt—"

"Oh my god."

"I’m not making you regret it now, am I?" Blaine asks with a grin. "You should have known I’d enjoy this."

"Uh-huh. We’ll see just how friendly that sword fight is."

"Your sword is indeed a mighty one—" Kurt snorts, begins giggling. "—but I happen to know that you are powerless in the face of mine."

Shaking his head, Kurt lets comfortable silence take over for a few minutes. Blaine’s fingers trace patterns into his shoulder and he, in turn, rubs his thumb along Blaine’s hip. Fairy tales  _do_  exist, he thinks. It’s the perfect ones that don’t. And, really, the “perfect” stories are boring.

He doesn’t know if they’ll find happily ever after. He doesn’t even know if the next beast that challenges them, or the one after that, or the one after that, will be the one that ends them for good. All he really knows is that Blaine loves him, and he loves Blaine. For that reason, it’s worth it to try.

"I love you, Sir Blaine," Kurt says softly. Blaine’s first response is a yawn.

"Sorry," he mumbles. "Tired. Love you too, Sir Kurt. Gonna nap now."

"Go ahead, sweetheart. I’ll be here when you wake up."

"M’kay."

Tangled in Blaine’s arms, legs, life - when it comes to them, this is all the happily ever after Kurt needs.


End file.
